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Saturday, January 10, 2015

When He Needs To Be Punished...

    The problem with taking long breaks from blogging is that you lose your momentum. In the original variant of this blog, I had an almost seamless flow in my posts. Of course, we all know (or at least those readers that followed the old blog) that blogger felt it necessary to delete that very successful blog which required a lot of time and very hard work on my part to get it where it was for no apparent reason or explanation? It makes me wonder how they might react to an assault to their own freedom of speech and expression? Mind boggling!



   This new version of the blog has not seen the same level of concentrated presentation of this man's journey into the world of Female Led Relationships involving Domestic Discipline so with that in mind I formally apologize if I have repeated certain events in my various posts. I will try to remedy that going forward. By the way, "forward" is a promise! I will continue to blog about this quest of mine for as long as it lasts even if that means continually creating new blogs over and over and over!



 









   Before I move on to the actual details of this post, I would like to inform my fellow bloggers that have been so kind as to link to my blog......many of you have outdated links for Ma'am Yes Ma'am on your pages. I briefly tried a wordpress version of this blog immediately following it's original demise however, I found that wordpress did not offer the editing tools that allowed the quality content so many of my readers had become accustomed to so I scrapped that blog and begrudgingly decided to begin here at blogger once again. This particular domain was a blog I started in order to offer interested readers the opportunity to purchase the custom, handmade, hardwood paddles I was producing a few years ago without taking up space on the main blog. I simply redesigned it to look more like the original blog and I am slowly adding to the content in order to get it back where it was. That said, the proper link for this page is:  http://mymimpressions-wdspoone.blogspot.com   If you could update your blog rolls to reflect this link I would greatly appreciate it. :)

Now, on to the topic of this post.....


 

    I am certain that my future holds a full-time Female Led Relationship incorporating Domestic Discipline, it is inevitable. My current job requires that I travel North America (US, Canada & Mexico) extensively. I am on the road at least 90% of the time which is the main roadblock in such a relationship becoming a reality. I am compensated quite handsomely in both money and perks for my efforts but, it requires a special kind of lady to commit to a man who is gone for extended periods of time. It also requires a few other adjustments that can be difficult to arrange such as geographic. Over the past few years there have been a few ladies I have met and admire greatly who would more than fit the bill as far as a (much needed) female authority figure in my life. This is not an insignificant development as finding someone that meshes with your own personal outlook can be very difficult if not impossible. With me calling the East Coast home and each of them residing in the mid-west, relocation becomes an issue.


 










 

    I personally don't view "spanking" as a sexual form of foreplay as it's primary purpose in a relationship. I believe it has very definite positive influences on a relationship when it is used as a corrective measure against unwanted attitudes and behaviors that are synonymous with the breakup of domestic partnerships. I further believe that a woman is better equipped to identify said attitudes and behaviors as well as correct them. That is not to say that domestic discipline in a female led relationship is some sort of miracle remedy without failure....there are many obstacles a couple faces i their daily lives together and there are many factors that need to be considered. Obviously some very basic truths regarding attraction must be met and this can involve many factors such as common interests, goals and values to name just a few. My point is that spanking, used as discipline (or punishment if you will) can effectively remove many of the destructive problems that cause the disintegration of so many marriages. Problems such as festering resentment, misunderstanding, disappointment, anger, frustration and communication can be eliminated through a mutually agreeable, structured arrangement.



 









    Of course there will always be a sexual connotation involved as there always is in female/male associations. But a structured system of authority within the household places a more serious approach and attitude toward it which is essential if it is going to be an effective tool. There are ways to remove sexuality from the administration of corrective punishment such as "milking" prior to a discipline spanking. The method in which the spanking is administered also differentiates the difference between a punishment and a sexual encounter....if the wife is fully dressed and conducted herself in a stern, business like manner toward her partially dressed or naked husband, his sexual arousal  will quickly fade especially if the spanks are delivered sharply and briskly and he is constantly reminded that she is not amused or pleased with his behavior. Once the punishment has been administered, a "timeout" period (whether that be standing in a corner or assuming any other position or task she decides upon) with no sexual contact afterwards clearly defines the fact that he has just been punished.



 










   There is no doubt that spanking can be a very erotic and arousing method of foreplay between a man and a woman and there are many couples that engage in it but the differences between this and punishment are stark and unmistakable. Sexual spanking generally involves sensual touching, stroking, kissing, sucking and gentle, intimate caressing. The spanks (which may be hard) usually build in intensity and while they may very well end in a flurry of hard, rapid spanks resulting in a very red and sore bottom, the sexual arousal has also been increased. Both parties are either naked or very scantily dressed from the outset and there is never any doubt that this is a sexual encounter as opposed to a serious punishment.



 










    If the man is anything like me, he may very well become aroused before and after a punishment spanking which often leads to the mistaken belief that the punishment is ineffective because "he likes it"! Nothing could be further from the truth. The source of my arousal before a punishment spanking is different than my arousal prior to (during and after) a sexual spanking. I happen to find female authority to be extremely sexy. The calmer and more business like she is while assuming the role of disciplinarian, the more sexy I find it. It should be noted that even though I am erect at this stage, I am also feeling a high level of humility and embarrassment.....I know from the circumstances that this is a serious, disciplinary situation and my erection is very inappropriate. I also know that the spanks are going to be hard and that they are going to hurt and I "do not" like that one bit. My erection always fades during the actual spanking. When I am doing my penence in the corner or draped over a stool or sofa arm with my bare, red, swollen, sore, well spanked bottom on display afterwards, the erection almost always returns but it returns against my will and resisting it, no matter how strenuously, prove futile. The source here is because I feel a very strong and overwhelming bond and admiration for the woman that just blistered my behind. Her strength and authority are a huge turn on to me but the spanking itself was very effective. I will try to avoid it in the future and instead opt for the sexual foreplay variety!



 










   Miss Lisa (often referred to by me as "L") became very good at differentiating between these two types of spanking. Sometimes she would summon me before her and trick me into thinking I was going to be punished (she found my nervous reactions to her authority to be sexually arousing) and then deliver a sexual spanking followed by release. In the video below (picture from this appeared in the last post), she administers this type of spanking. I believed I was going to be very soundly spanked over her knee for a misbehavior but it became clear not long into it that this was a sexual spanking administered in a role-play atmosphere although I didn't know my role prior to the spanking! You can see what I mean in this clip as the spanking is pretty hard at times and the pace is fast but, unlike a punishment spanking, she pauses to stroke, caress and excite. It is also administered with just her hand which was no walk in the park I assure you but, a dose of that followed by a hairbrush, paddle, wooden spoon, belt or any other implement could be an excruciating punishment especially since I never knew how long she would spank.



 














   Even in this example of a sexual spanking she maintains her "authority" as she switches between intense pain and erotic stimulation. Spanks to my anus and erect cock are followed by sensual strokes, masturbation and stimulating traces of her fingernails on my spanked bare cheeks. My underpants were slowly lowered to my ankles (which can be humiliating in itself) and eventually removed exposing me completely. In future posts I will discuss Miss Lisa in more detail, it was an interesting story of female authority.


























Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Establishing Her Authority

   I hope everyone (at least those that may still check in on this blog from time to time) had a very enjoyable holiday season. With the new year, I wish all a very happy, prosperous and healthy one. From the beginning of the Ma'am Yes Ma'am blog, I have shared my journey from it's humble and confusing beginnings to my embrace of the role of a submissive male to a strong, dominant lady. If you've read the earliest posts then you understand my reference to the term "confusing", it took me a while to accept the submissive role and more importantly, to settle the internal conflict between a natural desire and a learned image of masculinity. It's easy to look back and interpret that journey as a personal pilgrimage taken alone. I may have even written about it strongly suggestive of just that but the truth is, that journey was anything but a solo expedition. There were a handful of special ladies along the way without whom that migration would have remained forever in my thoughts and dreams.

   The neighborhood friend of my youth who eagerly engaged this desire with me during my early teens often willing to play the dominant female role and thereby helping to plant the seed to Miss Sadie who, through this blog, reached out and rekindled the appetite and inclination to live a life of devotion to a capable and firm lady. A leap of faith on both our parts brought us face to face not only with each other but with a fate which ran parallel in our lives. Both of us, not so much exploring but rather seizing our chosen roles and forging ahead in real-time with no apprehension....none we were willing to expose to one another anyway! Miss Sadie quickly defined our roles and removed any doubts. She did so first verbally as I was "dressed down" and put in my place mentally. Then physically as I was taken over her knee, my masculinity lowered long with my underpants as my bare bottom was exposed to her view and her hard punishing hand.

   So proficient she was at her task that it never crossed my mind to disobey her commands. The lecture and scolding administered by her on the final few miles of the drive from the airport to my house perfectly facilitated both my surrender and acceptance to her will and authority. I knew I was going to be spanked and I knew I was going to be spanked hard. Those that have followed this blog know I do not like being spanked. A spanking to me is pure punishment.....given properly, they hurt.....a lot! They are extremely humiliating and quite embarrassing. The ensuing erection had long baffled me given this fact and it took me a long time to realize that it is the authority of a determined female that I find remarkably sexy and arousing. Though my biggest fears were quickly confirmed when her capable hand began to smack my naked, vulnerable bottom cheeks delivering intensely stinging spanks that left no doubt that I was being disciplined, I never-the-less surrendered without hesitation when I was finally ordered to bend over her knee.

   In a short period of time, draped over her lap having my bare bottom spanked, my phlegmatic attempts to remain indifferent to my predicament gave way to complete submission and animated reaction to the fire building in my bouncing bottom cheeks. I kicked, I squealed, I yelped, I begged and I promised but more importantly, I respected her dominion not daring to attempt an escape! That respect persevered long after I was given permission to get off her lap, it lasted long after my isolation in the corner where I stood as instructed, underpants around my knees and bare, red, swollen and sore spanked bottom cheeks on display. It was the first of many trips I would make across her firm, capable lap. It was not in any way, the longest or hardest spanking she would administer to my bare, helpless bottom, but it was certainly one of the most memorable as it crumbled what was left of the resistance I may have had to submission and female authority.

   Another lady I have written about on that journey was "L". She introduced levels of submission and capitulation I never knew I would accept. Like most dominant women I have come across, she cultivated an attitude of compliance free of resistance no matter the demand. She required obedience to things I abhorred which resulted in a sense of satisfaction in me that I was able to comply to her requirements despite my strong distaste and distress. L introduced a new level of humility to my punishments. I would not only experience the embarrassment and humility of a sound bare bottom spanking with L, I would learn the terrifying humility of dressing in frilly lingerie for those sound spankings. I am not a guy that finds sexual satisfaction from such an act I assure you in fact, it is quite the opposite with me. L would set forth an introduction to the incredible pain and humiliation of a cock spanking as well as an anus spanking and test my commitment not only my submission to her but also to her authority!

   L was a master of humility and unbelievably to me, she quickly earned my admiration and devotion. Just writing that here still sounds ridiculous but it is no less true. Recently I pulled out some old laptops and pcs that had crashed some time ago and with the help of new technology, I was able to pull content off of them. Much to my surprise, I discovered some video we had shot (another attempt on her part to increase the humility of my punishments). I am including some of them in this post along with some stills. For those who have followed me on Spanking Tube, you are familiar with this material already but for those that don't, this material should serve to illustrate the fact that my spankings were never sexual in nature. I will write more in the future about L and some of the feelings I experienced during these punishments.

Regards,

Wdspoone (Tom)